


How to Outwit a Pair of Russian Super-Spies

by likethenight



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers Family, Birthday Party, Domestic Avengers, Fireworks, Fluff, Fourth of July, Gen, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Surprise Party, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-01
Updated: 2015-08-01
Packaged: 2018-04-12 09:47:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4474682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/likethenight/pseuds/likethenight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Natasha and Bucky are having a lot of quiet conversations in Russian about Steve. Steve suspects they're plotting something for his birthday, and aided and abetted by Sam, Clint and JARVIS, he manages to get in a little plotting of his own.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How to Outwit a Pair of Russian Super-Spies

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nerakrose](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerakrose/gifts).



> This was originally written over a year ago on Tumblr in response to a prompt by nerakrose, who wanted to see Natasha and Bucky being sneaky, and Steve (and Sam) outwitting them (her exact words were "bucky and natasha conspiring against steve but it backfires on them because steve is a sneaky son of a b (probably sam helped) (no sam definitely helped)" :D ). Featuring bonus extra help from Clint and JARVIS, a whole load of fluff and and silliness and cliché, and a whole lot more words than I expected! (unbetaed, un-fact-checked and un-US-picked, although I suspect it needs it - I've done my best but I'm sure I've missed a few. I am open to US-picking on this one!)

Natasha and Bucky are speaking together in Russian again. Steve has noticed them doing this more and more lately, as Bucky began to settle into the Tower, into the world. It's almost as though they knew each other before, although neither of them has said anything about it. Maybe they can't remember, or maybe it's just shared life experience. Their backgrounds - before coming in from the cold, as it were - aren't that dissimilar, after all. 

"What's _that_ all about?" Sam asks, coming into the kitchen and nodding in the direction of the two of them; they're sitting at one corner of the enormous table, big enough to fit all the Avengers around it although at the moment everyone else is off doing their own thing. Their heads are close together and they are speaking Russian in low voices, fast and unintelligible, and every now and then one of them glances at Steve and looks away again immediately, almost inadvertently. 

"No idea," says Steve. "I never did learn Russian. Gotta assume it's got something to do with me, though."

Sam watches them for a second, then punches Steve (relatively gently) on the shoulder. "Reckon so. You worried yet?"

"Not quite yet. Might need to have a word with Barton, though, when he gets back." Steve shrugs ever so slightly. "I figure he's got plenty of experience with Russian super-spies being all Mysterious and Russian. He might be able to shed a bit of light."

"Yeah, where _is_ this Barton guy?" Sam asks. "I hear all this about him from you guys, but he's nowhere to be seen. Beginning to think he doesn't exist."

"Oh, he exists all right," says a voice from the kitchen doorway, and Bucky and Natasha instantly fall silent, everyone in the room turning their heads almost as one to see - well, yes, Clint Barton himself, standing in the doorway with one eyebrow raised. "Do I need to be worried?"

"No more than usual," Natasha says, coolly, and Clint snorts.

"Seriously? My funding runs out on an op - which never happens, let me tell you - and there's nobody there when I call in, and when I get back to something like civilization I find that Fury's dead, SHIELD's in bits and half of those bits were HYDRA, you two have started taking in strays and Hill's working for _Tony_ , of all people. All in a day's work for you, was it?"

"Pretty much," says Natasha, although she's suppressing a smile. "Tell me, what did you do for funds once the SHIELD credit card stopped working?"

Clint lets out an undignified snort of schoolboyish laughter. "Seems the US Government owes Stark Industries a whole lot of cash. Tony gave me this black Amex after New York, in case everything went bad. I figured what's to lose? Good thing I did, too, otherwise I'd still be in Buttfuck, South America, halfway up a tree in the Amazon rainforest." 

Nat's no longer bothering to suppress her smile. "I'm sure Pepper will find a way of recouping the money."

"Sure she will," says Clint. "No end of respect for that lady and her business skills." He glances round the room. "So, are you going to introduce me to your waifs and strays, or what? I take it you found them in the wreckage or something? I mean, him I've seen before, pictures I mean," he gestures to Bucky, "but this guy?" with a nod to Sam, "never seen him in my life."

"Yes, you have," says Natasha. "Although you won't have seen his face. Remember that operation in Afghanistan? That was him. Sam Wilson. Codename Falcon."

Clint looks Sam up and down for a moment before breaking out into a grin. "Falcon, huh? Welcome to the birdhouse, buddy. Clint Barton. Codename Hawkeye." He sticks out a hand for Sam to shake, and Sam does, looking a little bemused. "And you," Clint continues, turning towards Bucky but not approaching him, "you're Bucky Barnes, right? Codename…" Bucky flinches, and Clint nods, sympathy in his eyes. "Yeah, we've all done things we've gotta live with, under the influence. You, me and her, anyway." He nods at Natasha. "Gotta live with 'em, though." He shrugs, and it's clear to everyone in the room, even the two who don't know him, that he's putting up a front so tall and wide it's impossible to see round it - and every last one of them understands. 

"Coffee?" Steve offers, because Clint actually looks dead on his feet, despite his cheery facade, and Clint flashes him a grin.

"Cap, I thought you'd never ask." He drops into a chair at the table, a respectful distance from Bucky and Nat, and Steve pours mugs of coffee for everyone from the seemingly bottomless coffee-maker. He and Sam sit down too, and Natasha begins to fill Clint in on everything he's missed, aided and abetted by Steve and Sam. Bucky doesn't say a word, but he hasn't bolted, which is a start, at least.

A couple of days later, Steve is passing through the bar area and he spots Nat and Bucky out on the balcony, heads together and deep in conversation, although they stop abruptly when they catch sight of him. 

"It's almost enough to make a guy paranoid," he says to Sam later that week, after it's happened a few more times, and Sam chuckles. 

"Two Soviet super-assassins talking about you in Russian and shutting up every time they see you? I'd say that's cause for concern." He grins. "Pretty sure you're safe, though. I might have been eavesdropping a couple times."

"I didn't know you spoke Russian," Steve says, and Sam laughs outright this time.

"I don't. But I sure as hell know how to read people, and you don't need to know Russian to recognise the word 'Steve' when it's practically every other word they're saying. There were a couple other words too, I got JARVIS to translate them for me. Once I'd sworn I wasn't listening in on a private conversation, of course." He grins. "Turns out those couple words mean July fourth, and JARVIS threw in a freebie, too, he says the next-most-used word in those conversations of theirs means 'birthday'. I think he likes you."

Steve frowns, confused, and Sam continues, grinning broadly. "Well, I guess he thinks that surprises are good and all, but you could probably stand to be forewarned if someone was planning something for your birthday. Don't want America's icon to drop dead of a heart attack or something."

"I'm pretty sure that's not going to happen," says Steve, but he's actually rather grateful for the warning. "Though I think maybe now I'm more worried than I was before."

"Keep listening," Sam says. "You know, if you can manage to be around without them noticing, listen to what they're saying. You might pick out a few more things."

So Steve is careful and quiet, and he almost manages to sneak up on Bucky and Nat a couple of times, except they always notice, now, they seem to be becoming more vigilant, and even with his enhanced hearing he can't get close enough to them without them switching to English and talking about baseball, or post-Cold War history, or the youth of today. He tries not to let his frustration show, especially now he knows they're planning something for him, for his birthday, but he knows he's not doing a very good job of it, something that's confirmed when Clint sits down opposite him at the kitchen table one morning when he's having breakfast after his morning run. 

"Coney Island," Clint says, apropos of nothing, and it takes Steve a moment to work out what that means in this context. Clint smiles over the rim of his coffee mug and elaborates. "My Russian isn't good enough to follow them when they're going that fast, but it's something to do with Coney Island, your birthday, and surprises. Which ought to be pretty self-evident, given that they're doing all the planning in Russian." He takes a mouthful of coffee, closing his eyes in satisfaction as the caffeine begins to get to work. "JARVIS wouldn't auto-translate, he said he'd given enough away already, but I figure that might be enough for you. What is it now, June twelfth? Plenty of time, if you need it."

"Thanks," says Steve. "How did you - ?"

"Air vents," Clint says, tapping one finger against his nose. "Don't tell Tony. JARVIS knows, but I think he's tacitly encouraging me."

Steve can't help but laugh. "You've been crawling around the air vents?"

"Second home," Clint says. "You'd be amazed what you can find out when you're sitting nice and quiet in an air vent. Even Nat doesn't always know I'm there - and she always knows I'm there. Usually."

Steve blinks as he parses that sentence, but he understands what Clint's saying. 

Clint drains his coffee, and gets up to leave, but on his way out of the door he pauses and looks back. "Oh, and Cap? One of the other words I did manage to pick out was 'fireworks'. Make of that what you will." 

Steve sits there long after he's finished his breakfast, thinking over what Clint and Sam have told him, and eventually he glances up at the ceiling, a habit he's never quite been able to break when speaking to JARVIS. 

"Uh, JARVIS? Could you do something for me?"

"Of course, Captain. Although if it has to do with the plans Agent Romanoff and Sergeant Barnes have been making, I am afraid I can tell you no more. I have already provided rather more information than I should have done."

Steve smiles; he likes JARVIS. He knows, but doesn't care, that JARVIS is theoretically "only" a computer - he's clearly got a wealth of personality and as far as Steve's concerned, not having a body doesn't make him any less of a person. "No problem, JARVIS. I just need to make a bit of an adjustment to something. Could you fix me up with whoever they've been dealing with?" He flashes a smile at the ceiling, because he's damned if he won't interact with JARVIS exactly the same way he interacts with everyone else. "I swear I won't ask any questions. I just want to see if they can…incorporate something."

"Very well, Captain Rogers," JARVIS says, "I will connect you directly." Steve could swear the AI sounds amused and almost affectionate, and he's struck by the thought, not for the first time, that if Tony didn't actually base JARVIS on someone who worked for Howard and Maria, then maybe this is what Tony would have wished for as a kid, someone to look after him and look out for him and take care of him and all his friends. 

Steve makes his call, and his request, and then he hangs up and heads down to the gym, where he finds Sam and Clint doing weights and trash-talking each other, and he's filled with a sense of peace and pride and happiness; if he had to end up years away from home, then here is definitely the best place he could possibly have wound up.

The tension seems to increase around the Tower as the Fourth of July approaches, the air of excitement growing more and more taut by the day. Bucky and Natasha are pretending that everything is normal, but Steve knows them well enough to tell that they're on edge, even without the conspiratorial glances they keep sending each other. Even Pepper seems affected by it as she flies in from DC two days beforehand, greeting Steve with a kiss on the cheek and telling him she wouldn't miss his birthday for the world. Tony is more live-wire than usual, although when Steve asks him, in a roundabout manner, if he knows of any plans for the day itself, he seems genuinely surprised. 

"Not that I know of, Capsicle. I mean, apart from the big Stark Industries benefit things on the afternoon, you know, raising funds for the rebuilding." He chuckles. "DC as well as New York, this year. You've been busy. Incidentally, why is Maria Hill now my problem?"

Steve smiles a little sheepishly. He'd known about the benefits and he's not exactly looking forward to them, but public appearances are part of the job and if his presence will help, then he's fine with doing it. Mostly.

"Tony," says Pepper, in the tone of someone who's had this conversation many times already, "Maria is not your problem, she is your employee. And a very great asset to the company, might I add."

Tony rolls his eyes, but he and Steve both know Pepper's right; former-Agent Hill is one of the most frighteningly competent people either of them has ever met, other than Pepper. Periods of short-notice leave of absence aside, she's turning out to be the most useful person SI has hired in a long time; and the leave of absence was to be expected, really, given that the fall of SHIELD was never going to be a clean job and there were going to be messes to sweep up for a long time yet.

Bruce arrives on the third, with an air of enforced calm about himself. "I'll appear at Tony's junket," he says to Steve quietly when they've all gathered for drinks that evening, "but I told him I didn't want too much attention."

Steve smiles, he can understand Bruce's reticence perhaps more than Bruce realises; he himself can't escape, as the headline act, as it were, but the part of him who wants to go and hide in a bar and play pool or something is not inconsiderable, and it's almost drowning out the dutiful part.

Still, they go along, and they do their bit, appearing on stage at the DC benefit gig and then hopping into a helicopter and heading over to New York to show up at that one, too. Steve and Tony give speeches and the others stand behind them looking supportive - Sam and Bucky, too, although they're not quite publicly known as Avengers just yet. "May as well get 'em used to seeing the pair of you," says Tony, and Sam grins and laps up the attention, and Bucky stands at the back next to Nat and almost vibrates with discomfort, but he stays put, and he sits really close to Steve in the helicopter and rests his shoulder against Steve's (his right shoulder, he's still not keen on anyone touching his left arm). 

And once it's all over and they're all crammed into the limo, Natasha slides the window open and says something to Happy, too quietly for Steve to hear, and the buildings sliding past outside the windows don't look like the ones on the way back to the Tower. He's got an idea where they're going, though, and when the lights on the rides become visible in the distance he has to try really hard not to smile, because he can tell that this surprise is something that means a great deal to Bucky, and to Nat, and he doesn't want to take that away from them. So when the limo draws up outside the gates to Coney Island and they all pile out, Steve is laughing like a boy because he always did love this place, and even if he was forewarned, it's still good to be here, especially today, when there are big signs up welcoming everyone to the Coney Island Fourth of July Fireworks Display, and Bucky is smiling tentatively from behind his hair. Steve claps him on the (right) shoulder and pulls him in for a hug, and Nat is smiling too, when Steve looks around, the whole damn lot of them are smiling, and he has to wonder who was in on this and who wasn't. Not that it matters, because it's his birthday, and he's surrounded by more friends than he's ever had in his life, and this is shaping up to be a really, really good day.

And later, when they've been on the rides and eaten something approaching their weight in junk food, and signed a few autographs and taken a few photos, and they're all settled on the beach, watching the stars, the fireworks begin, and they're all red, white and blue. Steve's a little wary as to what his own reaction might be to the noise, let alone Bucky's, but somehow knowing that they're just fireworks seems to be enough for his subconscious, and a glance at Bucky tells Steve that he's all right, too, so he can let out the breath he's been holding, relax and enjoy himself. Everyone cheers and whoops, especially when the sky is filled with clusters of fireworks bursting in circles, white at the centre and concentric rings of red, white and blue, Steve's shield in a thousand points of light. Steve laughs and blushes, surrounded by his friends all toasting his birthday with glasses of champagne, but really he's waiting until the next set-piece, one eye on his best friend in all the world, watching Bucky's eyes widen as a whole skyful of shields appear with red in their centres, a red star instead of a white one. Bucky turns to stare at Steve, and Steve inclines his head, just a little, a tiny salute. 

"Welcome home, buddy," he says, and he slings his arm around Bucky's shoulder and pulls him in for a sideways hug, letting Bucky hide his face while he collects himself and all their friends whoop and yell again. 

"How did you…?" Natasha demands, outrage in her voice and in the set of her lips, although her eyes are dancing, and Steve grins as Bucky rights himself again. 

"I had a little help. Didn't wanna ruin the surprise, but…you know, if you're going to be all sneaky and super-spy, you gotta remember we've got other sneaky super-spies in our ranks who aren't above telling tales to their captain."

"Aw yes," Sam yells, grabbing Clint in a headlock, "birds of prey for the win, my friends!" and Natasha dissolves into laughter, swearing vengeance on the pair of them. Tony can just be heard over the din demanding why he wasn't privy to any of this, and Pepper and Bruce are just smiling indulgently, affectionately, surveying the chaos before them. 

"Seriously, though," Steve says to Bucky, quietly, underneath the noise of all their friends in their various triumphs, "thank you. Means a lot."

"Same here," Bucky answers, curling his gloved left hand in the sand. "I wanted to say thank you for finding me. For keeping on until I remembered. For not giving up, you never were any good at giving up, you punk."

"Can't give up on you," Steve says, blushing a bit again. "You're the only one who knows me. It's why I kinda had to tamper with your plans, just a bit. So that you could see a bit of yourself up there, even if it's not what you'd have chosen. It's just that it's the only thing that works in fireworks." He gives Bucky a sheepish little grin, he knows Bucky never chose the red star on his shoulder, never wanted it, but as symbols go, it's pretty recognisable. 

Bucky smiles, just a little bit. "Tony reckons he can do something about that. Reckons I can have whatever I like there. Haven't decided what, yet, so I guess the red star'll do for now. Guess I can reclaim it for myself, isn't that what they say these days?"

"It is," says Steve, and he smiles, and this is definitely the best birthday he's had so far. He has almost all he could wish for, and that makes him the luckiest man alive, because having everything you wish for is very rarely a good thing, but almost everything…that's good. You have to leaven the happiness with a little sadness, it's all the sweeter for it. And far better than he could have hoped for, waking up in this world.


End file.
